Issue #1 - Overturn
I've decided to start a new publication as I enter a new, formative chapter of my life. I've just finished working a summer in Metropolis, Illinois, and I will return to my former life in Spain in one day. With this adjustment, I'd like to begin writing again. I'm mostly inspired by this post by Reggie about writing, technology, and the overlap with the cultures that interest me. I want some tangible way to document my thought process as I grow older and wiser.
I think a lot about a test I was given in school: it was a "creative writing" "idea generation" test in which the students were given a set timeframe and a textbox to enter their reply into. The prompt was something like: if you had one day left to live, what you do? I think, rather than answering the question honestly, I began to algorithmically analyze what an expected reply could've been. Word-count? I have seldom met a person who could type as quickly as I could, and I knew that I had only a set amount of time, so I set myself typing furiously. Okay, check one, good. Perhaps there was a program analyzing unique word choice? Easy, I typed using some more rare vocabulary words, and made sure my points were clear. Done, easy. Third: maybe it was legitimately testing my ability to create new ideas? Therefore I just attempted to say what I really meant, but at a certain point, I began writing about how I thought the medium was the message, and that this test was inherently unfair. How could you possibly accurately quantify creativity? This was during a time when I went to school with a lot of ESL students. Was this a fair, accurate assessment for them? (No).
And yet, we all have our differing music tastes, we all have our personal connections to God, but the difference between the first-rate audition and the last-place is stark, bleak, and obvious. Where does that leave us, beside with abject subjectivity?
The point I'm getting to is that I believe my ability to logically derive things can be no different from my ability to intuit things. I can only responsibly strive for a universal consciousness. This year, as I return to Spain, I have a goal to begin my personal career. I need to be able to make money and live on my own terms - this represents the next phase of my burgeoning conscious. Plus, these jobs kill my connection with God and creativity, which, frankly, makes me want to kill myself. What better motivation could I possibly ask for? I don't want to kill myself, or live and be spirtually dead. I can and will handle that. I hope this publication keeps my accountable for my self-imposed goals.